The Miracle Of The Moment

From Phoebe:

Well it’s hard to believe all that’s happened since we last blogged! Suddenly we are THREE. A family. With little baby to love and cherish, called Zoe Miracle Bakker. Zoe, meaning LIFE, and, life abundant, or, life to the fullest. It doesn’t mean just mere existence, but overflowing, passionate life.

Then there is the Miracle part. Well, for a start, isn’t all new life miraculous? Aren’t babies proof that God thinks the world should go on? When I hold little Zoe’s hand in mine, and see how perfectly formed she is in every detail down to the half moons on her fingernails, I think life should go on too! mily. With a little baby to love and cherish, called Zoe Miracle Bakker Zoe is 8 weeks old and Tim and I are still pinching ourselves. We can’t believe she’s OURS and we get to keep her! We’re not auditioning for the role of her parents…we won the part! We sit and stare at her while she sleeps, ignoring all advice to ‘sleep when she sleeps’, and she must be the worlds most photographed baby!. When I was pregnant, it seemed everyone wanted to warn me about the sleepless nights, the endless nappy changes, the disarray of the home, the way I’ll never be able to just duck up to the shops or out for a coffee without a bag full of baby paraphernalia, and all those other stories parents love to pass on to would-be-parents, but no one told me how full my heart would be. How does someone who is only 54cm long take up so much room in our hearts?

From Tim:
Looking back over the last year my heart fills itself with a real sense of satisfaction, contentment, gratitude, and hope for the days to come. What a full year it was!

And looking at where we are now, I can say we are more than blessed! First of all we have a beautiful daughter, our Zoe Miracle! Nothing could prepare me for the whole range of new emotions that have filled my heart, it’s a whole new world! She is an absolute miracle! In other cultures they talk about the pregnant women having happiness inside…well that happiness is now sleeping, feeding, and filling nappies in our home.
Apart from that we feel so supported by God, family, friends, church, acquaintances and the Australian government. Everything we needed has come our way. As the Bible promises to His people that: “He gently leads those that have young” (Isaiah 40:11)
God has really lead us gently in this season by providing for all our needs, and giving us Zoe to look after. And Zoe has such a peaceful and gentle spirit… it might have helped that she has received so much love, prayer, welcoming, and a sense of acceptance and belonging even before she was born! I’m looking forward to getting to know the uniqueness of who she is, caring for her, loving her, and teaching her God’s ways.

The COUNTDOWN has started!

Less than 10 weeks to go before our little baby will have it's first glimpse of daylight. Very exciting (and for Phoebe also exhausting) times for us. We have antenatal classes on Tuesday nights which really help in preparation for birth and labour... there is so much to learn about the whole process... it's been a real learning curve so far, but I heard the steepest curve is still ahead of us. They say that you can't fully prepare enough for what is about to happen when bringing a new human being onto the planet. So we'll just do as much preparation as possible... and then let the change hit our lives. I'm sure we'll be awe-struck at the sight of our son or daughter!
Just to give you an update on where we're at... well we arrived in Australia about 2 months ago now, and we stayed with friends for the first two weeks. Phoebe found a part-time/casual job at the call centre at church and worked there for about a month and a half before the belly really started to cause her to much discomfort, so she finished up about 2 weeks ago, and is now mainly focusing on mum-hood... setting up the nursery, preparing her hospital bags, sourcing the right baby equipment, and resting. We moved into a 3 bedroom place in Seven Hills North with a beautiful outdoor pergola area, it also has a massive tree with noisy parrot type birds... starting their birdsong... I mean birdscreaching... nice and early in the morning... and at night it houses some fruit bats.... which also audition for the bird-choir. Very different from the UK where the birds are not as pretty, but they can sing a nice tune. Anyways... little by little it's becoming a nice home. I am back working in the maintenance department at church... this time with a lot less work pressure... but still enough work at hand. I know I'm in the right place at the moment, which brings with it a feeling of contentment... but on the other side, I still feel a yearning in me to do all that God has in store for me. But I know it's wisdom to wait... and listen for God's cues, and not try to force things or do them in my own strength.
Our apologies for not being online as much as before... both our computers crashed... so we only have some moments here and there to jump online (after work or during lunch breaks) to keep in touch with you all.
For all you people on the other side of the planet... we miss you... and look forward to seeing you again in the near future.

Blessings,

Tim

AUSTRALIA: HOME

Wow. What a trip! Its now Tuesday morning and Tim and I are recovering after the longest flight in history! OK. Maybe an exxageration. 40 HOURS!!! It seemed as if we had every obstacle under the sun trying to stop us getting home, but we finally did, praise God. 12 hours at Schipol Airport in Amsterdam after waiting in line for the tix we had to pick up...KLM decides to install totally new system on Good friday which had all of its operators in confusion, staring blankly at their screens.... 17 flights were cancelled, so queues were everywhere, and our plane flew off without us, while we waited! Then we had delay after delay as KLM tried to fix things that were wrong with the plane, asking for "just another 15 minutes of our patience" for 2 hours! Once on board they tried to shut the door but the seal came off (ok thats reassuring) as well as the exit light above the door (just a few more minutes of your patience please...) and then my seat wouldnt go back (Phoebe) but of course the guy in front of me had his seat right back the whole trip (ggrrr) and my headset wouldnt work so i couldnt use the entertainment unit...I was NOT a happy traveller! Poor Tim tried in vain to find a comfortable spot to stretch out his long legs, but alas...squeezing a 6 foot 3 man into a 5 foot 1 space is not easy. 11 hours later we were cramped and grumpy (but still managing a smile), tired and achy and arrived in Kuala Lumpur for 4 1/2 hours of waiting where the machine promptly stole tims bank card leaving us with no money to even buy a drink, and all the comfy seats were in the cafes where you had to buy stuff to sit down...so we drifted and occasionally sat there anyway until someone came along to move us on...felt like a vagabond!

Eventually it was time for the last leg of the journey and this was pure bliss in comparison!!! Malaysian Air was fantastic and made up for some of the tedium from before, with comfy seats, headsets that worked, giving us more space to stretch out (they gave us 4 seats to share-yay!) and cool movies to watch. I watched Pursuit of happyness-amaaaazing...totally recommend it, and Tim watched Happy Feet, which he said was cute.

Arrived in Sydney to be greeted by Melisa and Gaby with freshly picked roses in a basket (nicked from the neighbours which i think makes it even more special, dont you?) and their gorgeous faces and cuddles. I felt like Princess Diana being presented with a posy of flowers. Then it was on to Coogee Beach to reintroduce ourselves to that amazing Australian phenomenon, the SUN. Over milkshakes and lattes and earl grey tea, we watched the waves roll in and soaked up the warmth and let the breeze blow away the trip. We even got a little sunburnt, how about that?!? A short play in the water up to our knees (Gaby went in in her clothes and i had fun pushing her), we were driven to Ray and Lindas where we have been put up like royalty, and where i slept for 16 hours in a bed that felt like a cloud. Yesterday was Easter Monday and a public holiday so we sat around catching up with Ray and Linda from brekky to lunch and have been househunting since. it feels so good to wake up to Australian birds and the brightness of the sun, and Tim and I feel like we are exactly in the centre of God's will for us right now, in the very palm of His hand. Catching up with friends and family is on our agenda, and finding that somewhere special to live is too. Keep us in your prayers as we wait on God for further instructions, and also that it all goes well with the pregnancy and job interviews this week.

Bless you

Phoebe

Going back to Australia

After finishing the training course 2 weeks ago Phoebe and I took some time out to see a bit more of the UK before flying over to Holland to catch up with friends and family. Peter, one of the men on the course, was so kind to take us to his retreat in the middle of the Welsh mountains, before taking us to Treardur Bay on the west coast of Wales. The landscape was absolutely stunning.... and refreshing (1 degree Celsius). We even had some light snow! We only stayed a day at Peter's place, but we definitely plan to go back there for a longer period of time in the future.

The drive from his place to the coast through the mountains was amazing! We tried to capture some of the beauty with the camera, but it's something that needs to be seen in real life to experience the majesty and awe of what God created.

We felt very small compared to these majestic mountains, but our God felt very big, which is a good thing!

Our time in Treardur Bay with our friend Todd and his family was inspiring. They made us feel like we were part of their family, with such warmth and generosity. It was a beautiful time of sharing what God has done in all of our lives.

We would have loved to stay a bit longer in Wales, but we had to return to Pierrepont for a hospital appointment in Guildford for our 20 week scan.

The 20 week scan was even more breathtaking than the Welsh landscape, we thoroughly enjoyed a half hour scan looking at our baby's wonderful anatomy, the face, the eyes, the lips, the brains, the chambers of the heart, the hands and feet, and even the baby's stomach. Our beautiful and healthy little son or daughter.

The day after the scan we said our goodbyes-for-now to Pierrepont, our home for the last 6 months, and flew out to Amsterdam. It was a challenge for us to fit all our belongings into the baggage and sticking to all the restrictions of weight, size, and what you're allowed to take on the plane out of London- they got even stricter while we were there- but we prayed for God to cover us and made it through customs with an extra 7 kg of weight without extra charges...phew! And that was with leaving a lot behind! New and dear friends, Samar and Sarah Riaz dropped us off at the airport, and it was one of those bittersweet moments where you want to go and want to stay as well. Its been an amazing, life changing season at Ellel, and its hard to believe its over! While challenging at times, it has been a very rewarding 6 months, and we are better for it.


Ahead of us is the bigger challenge. We're leaving for Sydney on Friday and are looking for a temporary place to stay while hunting for jobs and a more permanent place of residence in the Hills area. If you can help us out in any way we would really appreciate it. A big thank you for those of you who have already offered to help us out so far.

We are looking forward to seeing all of our friends and family when we are back, we have missed you and would like to introduce you to little Bakker. Of course, we would like to meet him/her ourselves!!!

17 week scan as promised

Here he/she is, blowing us a kiss. I am amazed at how clear it is!!!
On Friday I get another one for the 20 week stage and we are hoping that our baby will reveal the gender!!! Sometimes they keep their legs crossed and you have to wait...I would like to know, I think. I want to be able to pray over the baby and pray right into the gender...and then there's the planning of colours for the nursery! We dont know where we are gonna live when we come home but at least i'll know what colour to paint the room!!!

Moving ahead on the journey...

I'm grateful to God for sending us here, my main aim of being here was to support Phoebe in doing the course, and that's what I've been doing. But I've been so blessed by what God has been doing in my personal life. Apart from receiving more healing, freedom and restoration in my spirit and soul, God has renewed and sharpened my vision for the future.

I'm grateful for the opportunities God has given me here to be a part of the worship team, to lead people in worship, and also to teach people. I've known for a while that God had called me as a teacher of Kingdom truth, but here God has started to release me into this area of gifting. And it's only just begun. I've had some experience before, but this time around I felt ready and confident, the hand in glove kind of feeling. I'm looking ahead with an excitement in my heart for what God has in store for us.

Currently we're 17 1/2 weeks pregnant with 'little bakker' or 'pocket bakker', as one of our friends calls our little baby. A couple of days ago we had another ultra-sound scan to check if the baby was doing ok because Phoebe had a week of intense pains and we had little sleep! The baby is fine and healthy and the right size for its age, and we could see him/her doing little exercises and arching its back and wiggling its arms! we even saw it yawn and then it looked like it blew us a kiss! Right then the lady took the picture and its amazing. Next blog we promise to put it on for you to see! Phoebe is still experiencing lower backache, and we would like to ask if you could keep her, and particularly her health in your prayers? We would really appreciate that.

It won't be long before we will be in Australia again, the 2nd term of the course is finishing in about three weeks time, and in a month we'll be flying from London to Amsterdam to visit my family before we head out to the great warm southland. We can already say that our lives have been impacted and transformed by being here... we're so glad we said yes to God... we're heading back changed ready for the next step. What exactly is in store for us we don't know yet, but we're safe in His hands.

One thing is for sure- we wont regret this time of growing and stretching and learning and...making babies! We come home changed in more ways than one. :)

Cant wait to see everyone and hear how life has progressed for our friends and family in the last 8 months (wow, is it really that long?), and catch up over lattes(Phoebe) and Earl Grey teas (Tim). Not long now...

As for the teaching, as the term has gone on it has gotten progressively deeper and heavier in topics, but if anything has shown the amazing and restoring heart of God in the midst of what looks like hopeless situations. Today we heard the testimony of a lady who had fragmented into multiple personalities, due to severe abuse, and yet God had brought her back to wholeness and she was full of His life and hope. Of all the teaching, this one really impacted me (Phoebe) and I feel like she gave weight to all that we've been learning so far, and it is people like her that are the reason to be involved in this kind of ministry. I know its not for everyone, and not everyone needs this level of ministry (although i do think everyone needs this level of teaching-second to none), but for those who do need it...well, its wonderful to know that God is using Ellel so profoundly to heal brokenness in peoples lives and restore people to a vital relationship with God. I am deeply grateful to God for this ministry myself.

It's been a real step of faith for us coming all the way to the UK, but for those of you who have been following our story, you know how we felt God called us to go... all the lines have fallen into pleasant places, and we've been welcomed here with open arms. We really want to give a heartfelt thanks to those of you who have supported us with your encouragement, with emails, in prayers and thought, practically, and financially. We're still waiting for God to provide the remainder of Phoebe's course fees, but we know he has been our help so far and He will come through for us in His timing (does anyone ever wonder why it's so often last minute with God? or even after 'our' last minute, think of the story of Lazarus who Jesus raised from the dead after being in a tomb for 3 days). We would appreciate you standing with us in faith for this provision as well.

Winter wonderland

Here are some beautiful pictures of the one day of snow-pleasure we received from the heavens this month. To our dissapointment it only lasted for part of the day, but it we feel priviledged to have experienced some snow this winter for it has been a really mild winter so far.

It got Phoebe out of bed within seconds of finding out the whole place was covered in a white blanket of snow, and within minutes she was outside taking pictures on bare feet! I assume she doesn't see snow that often in Australia!

For me it had been years too, so I made sure to test my snowball making and throwing abilities... and I discovered that they we're still functioning well! Some of my colleages were on the other end of my tests, which resulted in me receiving some feedback in the form of round white balls flying in my direction. Great fun!

Great news!

GREAT NEWS!

WE’RE PREGNANT!!!

Here she/he is, at 10 weeks, 2 days old. The first photo of the inside of my tummy! And look! Someone’s in there! Snuggled in quite happily and waiting for more food.
We are absolutely thrilled to announce that we are now officially 12 weeks pregnant and are confident that all is well and our first ever baby is due on August 5 2007!!!

Here’s a beautiful story to go with the image you can see in front of you…
On November 3rd, 2006 Tim and I were at an Ellel Conference in Bath, UK. We were in a time of beautiful worship and I was kneeling down, when God spoke to me quite clearly that He had a gift for me. I sensed in my spirit to hold out my hands together and cupped, as if receiving a small, precious thing. I saw in my hands a glowing ball of light and God asked me if I would receive it. I then felt to kind of deposit it into my belly (where I believe our spirit is) area and felt a promise that I would ‘give birth to it’ at the right time. I assumed it was some kind of spiritual gift, even though nothing had happened like that before. The following day this baby was conceived. Of course, I didn’t know that until much later on when we checked our diaries with the midwife. Tim and I both believe that God has given us this gift and that it’s the right time because its His timing.
It will mean some changes in our plans, but nothing could compare to this privilege anyway.
I have been pretty healthy so far, my only real issue being that I wanted to tell everyone straight away and having a very wobbly start to the mornings. I feel very blessed because I know some of my friends had horrible sickness (thinking particularly of Ann and Maggie) but then they had beautiful babies who they wouldn’t swap for the world. I’ve had to become more disciplined about food- always being a very random eater- and I feel much like a cow, grazing all day. I wonder what my classmates think of me pulling out my little packed snacks all through the day…probably itching to pray with me for my eating issues!
The leadership team here at Ellel know, and their response was really lovely. Of course, everyone wants to pray a blessing over the baby, and I’m not gonna say no to that! It has changed the things I can/cant do as part of the ministry team because first and foremost they want to protect the spirit of the baby. That means I can’t minister on healing retreats or deliverance workshops or conferences where people might need deep level prayer. Because you never know what you will encounter until you start to pray with someone, its wisdom for me to be involved in another way. I can be in the drama team on church visits and on the intercession team which is cool and something I really wanted to be involved in anyway.
So when we come home in March, I’ll be 6 months pregnant, and hopefully will have that ‘glow’ everyone tells you about and not the pale, green, complexion I have now!
Clothes will be an issue soon, so all of my recently pregnant friends- DO NOT THROW ANYTHING AWAY!

Here in the UK they give you a big bundle of free stuff when you’re pregnant , and that includes a pretty comprehensive book covering conception, pregnancy, birth and aftercare, and you get these Mum To Be packs for free from the chemist right up until the baby is 6 months old! That’s not a bad system. I just don’t know if I’ll be able to bring any of it home with me! I have been reading everything and Tim has been right there with me, reminding me to eat, take my folic acid and drink loads of water. He has been great. He was so cute after seeing the scan, I thought he would burst he was grinning so much, and when he went back to work he could get nothing done for the rest of the day!
I have my second scan end of March so will post that too, along with if it’s a boy or a girl if they can tell me that by then.

Love to you all…Thanks for reading right to the bottom…
Phoebe, Tim and …little Bakker xx

Chilly weather...(brrrrr...)

We welcomed 2007 this year around the fire-place, warm and cosy inside, no need for air-conditioning. That's a bit of a change, especially for Phoebe, this is her first British-european-northern-hemisphere winter... for me it's been only 6 years ago. So for Phoebe there were no carols in the domain, no picnic rugs, no wiggles singing "Go santa go!", no sand, no surf, no SUN!!! (only on a rare occasion a glimpse of sunlight breaks through the fog)
On the other hand we did experience some light frost, we sighted many squirrels, we had Dutch olie-bollen for new years, sang a lot of old english Christmas carrols, tried some malt wine, and enjoyed staring into the crackling fire. No snow yet, but we're still hopefull!
Anyway... there's a fresh new year ahead of us!